So, what is the number one thing that prevents men from being really great dads?

The answer may surprise you...

Moms.

Now, all of you put down your rocks, there will be no stoning today. Allow me to explain.

Moms and dads have different roles. In many homes, dads are the primary breadwinners in that they leave the home during the day due to some kind of external employment. Moms stay home and run things on the domestic front, caring for young ones and tending to their every need. Both different responsibilities, but both absolutely necessary for a functioning household.

But staying home does have it's advantages in the relationship field.

Jenny is an incredible mother. She spends more time caring for our little ones than anyone I know. She feeds, changes, and nurtures our children so they are healthy and happy. She provides quality time and experiences with the kids so that, in turn, they adore her.

What do dads do?

Well, in many cases, dads come home from work and, if they are good fathers, they will play with the kids for an hour or so, then it is time for dinner and bed. Children know and like their dads, but not like they love and adore their moms. They just haven't invested the time like moms. Sure, dads may pitch in with the care-giving every now and then in that they give a bottle before bedtime or perhaps change a diaper or two, but it is nothing compared to moms.

Not to mention we are built differently. Moms come with the "Equipment" to feed the babies, and really, this act of service from mothers provides a bond that will remain unshaken during the infant years. Dudes can't touch this.

When my first tow boys were little, I thought they were great, but I couldn't wait for them to get older. I wanted to throw a football with them. I wanted to "play" with them. I didn't want to just sit there and hold them. Boring. To be honest, I didn't' even really like them when they were little. Jenny would sit and swoon over them. I would happily hand the baby over, of course only to help realize her desire ;)

When Alex got older to where he could actually do stuff, I started becoming interested. We played sports together. We have season sports tickets together. We would read books together. He became one of my best friends. So when Isaac was little, I would always take the older Alex so Jenny could focus her attention on baby Isaac. In reflection, I didn't have much to do with Isaac when he was little because I had Alex and Jenny did everything for the littlest one.

Moms raise babies in such a way that they don't really need dads. When babies cry, they want mom. When they need comfort.... mom. Hungry.... mom. Dads can provide some relief to moms every now and then, but the need is nothing compared to the mother. As a consequence, dads are forced to play catch up in the relationship game later in life or they always remain the distant parent.

If moms allowed/forced dads to do more in the earlier stages of a babies life, then relationships between babies and fathers would be stronger and they would be closer in later years.

Enter Daxton and Elsie.

About 8 months ago, we had twins and everything changed.

The major difference between having one baby and two is that DADS ARE MOMS as well! Mom can't care for two babies all the time so dads are forced to step up their game in the mom category. I rock a baby to sleep every night. I feed a baby at every meal. It seems like I don't ever stop changing diapers. I get a baby dressed in the morning. Wherever we go, I am carrying a baby. I am always responsible for one of them. There is no hand off. There is no break. There aren't many dads who can say this.

Every day.

I am mom.

As a result of my invested time, I adore these babies. I don't want them to ever grow up. I can't wait to see them, to play with them, to hold them. And in return, I think they adore me to! When they cry, they want me. When they are hungry, they want me. When I walk in the room, they climb up on my leg. A smile always breaks across their face when I look into their eyes.

And this is the greatest reward.

I'm sure mom still has me beat, but at least I come in as a close second.

And that is fine with me!

I love this time of year. But this year, I love it for some different reasons.

I love Fall because it is the season of college football, and if you know me and my family, we LOVE the Cougars. But Cougar football is not what this post is about.

Fall is also the season for two of my sons PLAYING football. I can't think of anything I enjoy more than going to games and practices and watching my boys put on the pads/flags and get out there and have fun!

I have even subjected myself to being the coach of said teams. Last year, I was the head coach and offensive coordinator for Alex (10) and this year I am the offensive coordinator of Isaac's (6) team.

On Thursday at Isaac's game, things went really well for our team. We jumped off to a quick lead and we were totally owning our opponents. I felt like we could do anything against these guys. We put different kids in different positions. We ran crazy plays. Everything we attempted ended up in a touchdown.

The other team: nothing. Our defense continued to shut them down, play after play. In seeing the discouragement on the other teams' coaches and players faces, I determined that this was nothing new for them. It was obvious they hadn't seen much success throughout the season. It was tough to see other 6 year olds feeling a little discouraged.

So, towards the end of the game, I met with our team's other coach, and we decided we were going to help the other team out. We met in the huddle with our boys and asked if they were having fun! "YES" came the unanimous yell. We then discussed that we didn't think the other team was having as much fun because they hadn't scored (we learned later they hadn't scored all season). We asked the boys how they would feel if we helped them score a touchdown. EVERY boy shook his head in agreement that this is an idea they could support. They didn't care about the score. They were having fun and they wanted the other boys to have fun as well.

Operation "Don't pull the flag" was about to begin.

I walked over to the coach of the other team and I whispered to him, "Just run the ball."

I turned to Jenny. "Watch this."

The ball was snapped. The clumsy 6 year old handed the ball off to the closest guy. He started to run towards the outside. Our defense swarmed him like they had done all day, but then, something special happened. One boy dove purposefully towards the runner but obviously missed. The rest of our team collapsed on the runner, but instead of pulling the flag, they surrounded him and, not knowing what else to do, ran WITH HIM down the field. Our defense was the running back's own personal escort.

To the 15, the 10, the 5, touchdown!

The sidelines erupted.

The parents of the other team jumped to their feet cheering hysterically! Then our parents started to understand what had happened and they joined in the cheering. The other coaches ran to their players and embraced all of them. And then the players.... they celebrated like they just got every Christmas present they ever put on their wish list.

And our players just sat and watched. And smiled.

I glanced over at Jenny who understood what just happened. She had tears in her eyes.

I never thought one of the best moments as a coach would be watching another team score on our defense.

It was definitely something special.

Holy cow it has been a long time since we blogged. Sincerest apologies. This is what summer does to us in this house. Fortunately, things are settling down a bit and you will hear from us more often.

Last week, Happily Ever After Video and two weddings at the Logan temple on one day. Neither had receptions attached, so we decided to load the whole family up and spend the night in Cache Valley. Well, with a name like that (Cache Valley), we decided it was an omen to discover our 100th cache here.

For those you who don't know about what I speak, here is a short explanation. My family is totally addicted to geocaching. Geocaching is a high tech form of treasure hunting utilizing GPS navigation, hints, maps, recent logs, etc. all to find hidden treasure planted by fellow cachers all over the globe. It is a super fun activity that every member of the family can enjoy.

So, below is a tribute of some of our favorite caching adventures!












Our first cache placement.
First Geocoin!

So do you know where you want to be buried?

I do.

Morbid? Maybe...

Every family has their favorite vacation spot...

Ever since I was a little boy, my family has annually visited Island Park, Idaho. It started out just taking trips to Yellowstone to see the animals and geysers. But over the years, our travels to this part of the world have become a tradition and a staple which I hope are never exhausted.

In the beginning, we would simply overnight it in a local West Yellowstone hotel. Today, our family (mom and dad) own four, wonderful condos at the Island Park Village Resort where we experience every luxury. The resort has a pool, tennis courts, golf course, a variety of rental programs, racquetball, and even ping pong. My kids also engage in the weekly craft gatherings to the playing of every board (bored) game under the sun.

Island Park is a heavily wooded, mountainous area which experiences perfect 70 degree temperatures in the summer. Here, streams around every bend meander their way through one pristine meadow after another. Animals such as moose, deer, elk, and even bear wander freely and uninhibited. Fishing is ideal. ATV'ers are spoiled with trails that lead everywhere and nowhere. The air is crisp and fresh, which, when accompanied with the surreal Island Park surroundings, rejuvenate the soul.

One could simply sit on the porch and watch the sun set and feel.... overwhelmingly.... satisfied.

Complete.

I love it here. I want to grow old in this place. And yes, I want Island Park to house my final resting spot as well!

This last week we finished up another successful vacation as a family at Island Park and like all our vacations, the days went by too fast. I need this place to be a little more permanent!

I guess it's back to counting down the days till our return next year.

Thanks mom and dad, for introducing me and my family to this part of the world and enabling our frequent return. Island Park is a legacy you have fostered which I intend to share with my family and we will always be grateful to you for the many wonderful experiences you have facilitated.

You will always be remembered for your loving generosity. We love you!

(Matt here)

Adolf Hitler was kind of a trouble maker.

In 1923, Hitler attempted his first overthrowing of the German government. He was unsuccessful and his attempt landed him in jail for "political crimes". While imprisoned, he decided he would document his struggles in an autobiographical book titled "Mein Kampf", which is German for "My Struggle". Simply put, it is in this book that he laid out his agenda for all that he deemed good, how to realize such euphoric goodness in his surrounding environment, and finally, how to terminate that which didn't quite fit into his Utopian game plan.

His Struggle.

He wrote a book on it.

So what is your struggle? Could you write a book about it?

Hey! One big whine session! Fantastic...

So, this post today is entitled "Mein Kampf" because I am going to let you all in on a little piece of my psyche.

I had a friend a long time ago. A dear, dear friend. I haven't seen this friend now for quite some time. This friend was special because he always made me feel so good about myself. I wanted to spend all day with this friend, once I really got to know said friend. It wasn't easy at first, but after a while, this friend and I REALLY hit it off. If I went one day without seeing this friend, the day was just all the harder and I couldn't wait to see said friend as soon as possible.

Don't you wish you had such a friend?

Well, so do I. Again, I haven't seen this friend for ages and I desperately miss this friends company.

So, who is this friend you ask?

Said friend's name is: (drum roll.........)

Exercise.

There was a time about a year ago, I was running everyday. I never felt better! I lost a lot of weight and things were going my way. I ran a 10k. I was actually fitting into my pants and even having to go buy skinnier ones. I cared about what I ate and meals didn't simply consist of everything. I had time to go to the gym.

The hard work was really quite blissful and I have never felt better.

I guess thats what feeling healthy does to you. I hardly remember. It has been too long...

So what is your "Mein Kampf"? Well, mine is exercise. I need to get back on the horse. I need to rededicate myself. I need to make it happen and become reacquainted with my long lost friend that could prolong my life so I can spend more years with my grandbabies. I mean, seriously, is there anything more important that that?

So, I am not sure where this post is going from here, but I will say that I am going to call my old friend this week and see if said friend wants to get together sometime....

I'll tell said friend you said hi, that is, if this friend will take me back.

I am addicted to facebook. I admit it. I check my phone for updates all the time. I love seeing what other people are doing and I enjoy all the sarcasm and humor.

However.

Some people don't get it. They don't understand what facebook is. Or what the purpose is. It is where we publish superficial tidbits about our lives for those around us. That's it. Girls night out is a better place to discuss the disfunctionalities of our lives. Not the world wide web. I sometimes wonder if some people realize anyone could be reading their comments...

So I wrote a list to help. Here it is. Take it or leave it.

1. Thou shalt not whine.
OK. We all have bad days. Crappy things happen. Fine, tell us. We're your friends and we want to know. This is for those people who continually post their woe-is-me status updates day after day after day... you know the type.
2. Thou shalt not publish thy dirty laundry.
Facebook is not the place to tell the world about the fight you're having with your husband. Period. Call your therapist.
3. Thou shalt not call names.
Are we really in Junior High again? C'mon. (Of course, name calling in jest or when funny is acceptable, but if you're not sure, don't do it)
4. Thou shalt not publish your bedroom escapades.
Need I go into this one?
5. Thou shalt attempt humor once in a while.
Now I am neither funny nor witty, but I try. In this arena, go for it. The standard "I went to the park. I love chocolate. I am a mom. I work at Zions Bank.." Boring. Jazz it up a little. Give it a whirl. With practice, you may become that funny person you always wanted to be.
6. Thou shalt publish a variety of topics.
At the risk of offending someone, I have some friends who post about the same thing every day. I don't even read their posts anymore. Move along. Next subject.
7. Thou shalt comment on other statuses.
You don't have to comment on everyone. But some statuses sometimes. We all like to be acknowledged. It only takes a minute so just do it.
8. Thou shalt use caution in publishing personal information.
This is the world wide web. Be smart. No phone number or address listings.
9. Thou shalt have a facebook account if your kids do.
Now this is mainly for parents of teenagers. Just another way to spy on your kids. Don't act like you don't want to.
10. Thou shalt not accept all friend requests.
This is more of a rule than a commandment. It's OK to say no. You don't know the person? You don't like them? Say no. It's all right.

So there it is. I got that off my chest. Whew. I feel better now.